Oneirophobia

the fear of dreams not easily explained

for dreams are something most can not evade  

dreams are the true windows to the soul,

for the one who dreams has no control

the reflections of your desires

cut through you as sharp as briers

your subconscious telling you the truth

expecting you to be the sleuth

a mystery inside your head

will haunt you until you are dead

for the meaning to be truly uncovered

something inside yourself must be discovered

a darkness you not knew you had

maybe a lust that could only go bad

when imagination mingles with the real

a fate that unwanted you just sealed

nightmares haunt the land of dreams

awake you when you should sleep

keep you wondering all through the night

how this could possibly be right  

School Reading

Seeing as that school is starting in a week for me, I decided it was time to talk about school reading. In school we are obviously assigned books that we have no choice in reading. I hate this because I love reading young adult novels and it turns out we never get to really read those in school. I of course still like a bunch of the books that I am forced to read. I loved both One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest by Ken Kesey and 1984 by George Orwell. I also hated Frankenstein by Mary Shelly, The Power of One by Bryce Countenay, and Big Mouth and Ugly Girl by Joyce Carol Oates. My favorite school reading assignment was freshman year when we got to read any three books the whole year and write book reviews of them. This is what got me into writing about books. If I hadn't had this assignment, I would have never started this blog and that would have been a true tragedy! This summer I had my first summer homework assignment since summer before 8th grade. I had to read How to Read Literature Like a Professor by Thomas C. Foster and any other work of literary fiction (sadly not YA because life sucks) and then write an essay about it. I have to say, I really hated reading How to Read Literature Like a Professor for the purpose of taking notes and writing an essay. It totally helped with my writing (I am writing a book that I will tell you all about later) and I wish I wasn't forced to write about it in a homework assignment. For my other book, I read Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut. I really, really loved it! But because I had to write an essay on it, I had no desire to write a book review on it, which is honestly the worst feeling. I love reading, but being forced to read in school sometimes makes me understand why other people don't want to read. Oh well, this is why I always make sure I have a new, beautiful book and time each day to read it. My biggest fear (besides bees and blood) is starting to hate reading! Luckily the IB reading curriculum looks really interesting so I think I am safe for now! Anyways, I hope you all are having a wonderful time reading and that none of us ever lose interest!

    

Winter

she whispers softly in my ear
sleep gently darling winters here
cold and darkness soon arrive
and frigid stillness gentle stride

secrets swirling in the air
arrive in slumbering death's lair
and as we rest alone and deep
all the little lies we try to keep

sequestered in our own self pride
we envy the leaves that slowly died
for when we are chilled to the bone
we know our hatefulness has grown

fingernails bitten down to stubs
we have forced ourselves into a lonely club
greed will only take so far
before one starts to miss the par

but still we sleep through every night
so when winter comes we will fight
and lose we must for we will go
when winter leaves and melts the snow

Books Everyone Else Likes, but Me

We all know how fun it is to rant about the books we don't like and it turns out it is equally as fun to write about them! Today I picked a bunch of books that are popular with everyone else, but definitely are not on my favorites list. I do have to explain that the main reason I don't like these books stems from the writing and not usually the plot. All of these books have really great ideas, but the way they were written does not work for me. Please do not start to hate me because I don't like your favorite book! I mean no offense to any of you! Books can be perfect for one person and terrible for another, so just because I did not like these books, it does not mean that you will hate them! I hope you enjoy!

1. What Happens When You Mix The Hunger Games, The Fifth Wave, and The Darkest Minds With Bland Writing 

I read this book after a bunch of my friends told me I would love it. It took me forever to read and I only finished it because I hoped the ending would be better. The characters were super extreme and the way they act is so not how fifteen year olds are. I love dystopian novels, but this just felt like overkill. The romance also felt super forced and this is coming from someone who loves romance in every single book. Marie Lu just does not work for me. If you want an alternative to this book, try The Darkest Minds by Alexandra Bracken. Both are fast paced dystopian novels with corrupt governments.     

Legend by Marie Lu
My rating: ❤❤

Leaving readers confused and underwhelmed, Legend by Marie Lu does not live up to the hype. June is from one of the wealthiest families in the Republic. She has been groomed since birth for the elite military that serves her ever at war country. Day, the Republic's most wanted criminal, hails from the slums. He just wants to fight for what he believes is good. When Day becomes the number one suspect in the murder of her brother, June sets out for revenge. As June starts to hunt Day, she sees that he may not be everything the government makes him out to be. As the secrets start to unravel, June and Day must work together to discover what is really going on in their country. I really did not enjoy this book. The characters were completely unrealistic and there was no way for me to relate to them. The story was interesting, but it was really confusing and hard to follow. The setting kind of felt like a bunch of different dystopian novels mixed together. This book did come out before a lot of the other dystopian novels, but by the time I read it, I was really sick of the same type of story. When I finally finished the book, I had no desire to continue with the series. Even though I kind of wanted to see how the story ended, the writing was so bland that it totally outweighed it. I would only recommend this book to people who have already read something by Marie Lu and loved it.

2. And You Thought We Were Liars Was Confusing 

I honestly hated this book. I read it my Freshman year of high school during a week of testing for the other grades. We had big blocks of time to do what we want, so of course I decided to read. I ended up finishing the book during my first period Spanish class (which was entirely full of Sophomores because, I am so cool and a year ahead, so everyone was still testing 😂.) I had nothing else to do so I reread the ending over and over, trying to make sense of it. In order to write a good book, the characters have to be realistic enough for the reader to relate. The characters in this book had no redeeming qualities or anything to make them believable. If you really want to attempt this book, try We Were Liars by E. Lockhart. The plot of this book has the same kind of feel and a lot of the same events seem to happen. If you get through We Were Liars and did not feel at all confused and you really loved it, then try this book.

Suicide Notes from Beautiful Girls by Lynn Weingarten
My rating: ❤

Readers should be prepared for extreme confusion and outrageous characters in the unsuccessful thriller novel that is Suicide Notes from Beautiful Girls by Lynn Weingarten. June and Delia were closer than best friends, until one fateful night broke their bonds. A year later Delia is gone leaving only a suicide note behind. in an attempt to help with her grief June starts to notice some cracks in the story of Delia's death. Soon June is investigating Delia's murder and it seems like everyone in her life is a suspect. As the truth starts to come out, June learns that Delia is not the person she thought she was and there is more to her death than June could ever imagine. This might be the most confusing book I have ever read. I have read and reread the ending and done research and I still do not understand the ending. The characters are insane and completely unrealistic. This book takes a lot of mature subjects and difficult situations and kind of glorifies them. Suicide is completely idolized and all of the characters are bordering on psychopaths. I really disliked this book as it was frustrating, improbable, and slightly horrifying. I would not recommend this book to anyone and to those who really want to try it, you should be issued a trigger warning.

3. If I Wanted to Hear Someone Complain I Would Just Go Find My Sister

The only reason I think this book got popular is that there is a lack of LGBT books, so even the ones that suck are promoted. There is a simple solution to this problem, just write more LGBT books! I just hate the fact that it has taken this long for us to finally have characters in books who struggle with real life issues such as coming out as gay and what we end up with is this. This comment also goes for Will Grayson, Will Grayson. (see below) There are so many better books than this where the main character is going through the same thing as Simon. Try I'll Give You the Sun by Jandy Nelson or Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe or The Upside of Unrequited by Becky Albertalli!!!!! You want something in the fantasy genre, try Carry On by Rainbow Rowell. (I have a full review of I'll Give You the Sun Here and for Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe and Carry On I have spoiler free reviews on my spoiler free review page!) See, so many better options, including one by the same author. The two good things I have to say about this book are that it was better than Will Grayson, Will Grayson and the cover is awesome. 

Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli
My rating: ❤❤

Becky Albertalli disapoints readers with a whiny, slow book, that feels a little bit too much like Will Grayson, Will Grayson in Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda. Simon is not ready to come out as gay, so when an email to his mysterious pen pal Blue falls into the hands of trouble maker Martin, Simon has no choice but to submit to his blackmail. Being Martin's wingman isn't easy and it seems like Simon's friends are growing away from him. Simon's junior year shouldn't be this difficult right? This book was boring. There isn't much going on and the problems feel really exaggerated. Simon's life feels like the movie GBF, but without all of the comedy, so its just melodramatic teenage angst. As you can see, there is so little happening in the book that I was barely able to write two sentences describing the plot. Speaking of the plot, it is super predictable. The second Simon mentions writing to a mysterious pen pal you know who it is and the rest of the story is just as easy to guess. The book is fine if you don't like action or real movement of plot. The funny thing is, Becky Albertalli is a really good writer. The Upside of Unrequited is fantastic and her writing style is completely different from Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda. You can read this book if you think it sounds interesting, but if you did not like Will Grayson, Will Grayson then you will not like this book either.

4. Why John Green Why?

Okay warning I hate David Levithan. Everything I have read by him I really didn't like. His writing just doesn't work for me. I love John Green. I was so disappointed by this book. I was disappointed for basically the same reasons as Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda. Also Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda has a lot of the same plot as Will Grayson Will Grayson. Gay guy struggling to come out to his friends and familya and in an intense secret relationship with an mystery guy. I wish that only John Green has written this because then I think I would have liked it more. 

   

Will Grayson, Will Grayson by John Green
My rating: ❤❤

John Green can only work so hard to cover the disappointing nature of David Levithan's writing in Will Grayson, Will Grayson. Will Grayson could not be any more different from the other Will Grayson. One is in love with a girl and is friends with Tiny Cooper, creator of the autobiographical musical Tiny Dancer. The other is in love with a boy he met online and is about to learn that his best friend Maura might not be quite as nice as he thinks she is. Both will meet on one fateful night and their lives will be forever intertwined. John Green does not deserve to have a book rated as only two stars by me. So I am giving all parts written by David Levithan two stars and everything written by John Green three and a half stars. I really did not like where this book went. Will Grayson two (written by David Levithan) was horrible to read about. He was boring and his depression didn't feel real, it kind of felt like it was being made fun of. Will Grayson one was okay, but the real star of this book was Tiny Cooper. He was interesting and fun and totaly extreme. I loved Tiny, but he couldn't pull for everything else in this book that was not good. I know a lot of people love this book because it was the first LGBT books to get really big, but its fame doesn't make the book good. I'm not quite sure who I would recommend this book too as John Green fan don't always like David Levithan and David Levithan fans seem to rarely like John Green. So I would recommend this if you really love them both.

5. The Plot is Fantastic...If Only the Writing Was Good 

This book should have been good, but sadly it wasn't. It desperately needed better writing and some comedy to cut through all the drama. This book is something that I would actually recommend to others, but only if they want something really easy that has a lot of plot twists. If you love comedy, then do not read this book as you will probably hate it. Otherwise, if you can get past the writing, the story is really great.

The Maze Runner by James Dashner
My rating: ❤❤

The Maze Runner by James Dashner shows just how much terrible writing can ruin a great plotline. When Thomas wakes up all he can remember is his name. He is welcomed into a community of all boys, all around his age, all who have had their memories wiped. They live surrounded by a maze full of terrible creatures. Thomas seems perfect for the job of the maze runner, a person who creates a map of the maze before the gates close. When a girl shows up and some how remembers Thomas, they realize that there might be more to their community than meets the eye. I wanted to like this book so badly. The plot was fantastic and the story was fascinating. The writing was awful and at such a low level of vocabulary that it just ruined the whole book. The characters were not that great either. Because they can't remember anything of their past it was kind of hard to get to know them or relate to them. I wish the writing was better because then I think I would have enjoyed it more, but I guess life isn't fair. I would recommend this to fantasy lovers and people who are looking for a really really easy read. I do have to warn you that while the writing is simple, the plot is confusing.

Girls Made of Snow and Glass by Melissa Bashardoust Full Review

Spoiler Free Review:

Girls Made of Snow and Glass by Melissa Bashardoust
My rating: ❤❤❤❤

Melissa Bashardoust hit the ball out the park with the fantastic, feminist fairy tale that is Girls Made of Snow and Glass. All Lynet has ever wanted is to be like her stepmother Mina, but she is constantly compared to the late mother she resembles so greatly. Mina just wants to love and be loved, but the unbeating, glass heart in her chest won't allow her to. Lynet has no desire to rule, so when her father takes away Mina's control of the Southern lands and gives them to her, she wants nothing more than to refuse. When a turn of events cause Mina to hate Lynet, she must go on her own journey to save the only mother she has ever known. This book was so adorable! I am always a fan of feminist fiction, especially when it's fairy tale related. The story felt like a mixture of frozen and Snow White, but still very original. I love how the story was from both Mina and Lynet's point of view, giving the reader different perspectives. Because it was a mixture of both of their stories the characters didn't feel extremely well developed until the very end, but I still felt connected to the them and able to relate to their feelings. The plot felt kind of slow at the beginning and then kind of rushed at the end, but the well done story totally made up for it. As a romance lover, I of course wish there was more of a love story, but it was really well done and a heavy influence of romance might have ruined the message. One thing I felt there was a lack of was comedy. There are very few places that made me laugh and I think it would have been improved if there was just a little more humor. Overall this book was really really good and I would highly recommend this to fantasy and feminist fiction lovers! Disclaimer: I was sent this book for review from the publisher, but it did not effect my review at all. My thoughts are my own and my reviews are always 100% honest.

Recommended Mindset For Reading 

This book is perfect for anyone looking for a fairy tale without all of the men doing the saving. It has very light romance so if you are not into the hot and heavy stuff (unlike me) then this book is perfect for you! I didn't binge this book. I ended up splitting up my reading into a couple of days because it just wasn't the kind of book where you have to read everything all at once. This book is perfect for the start of the school year because you can read a little bit in your free time and spread it out over a couple of weeks. If you are the kind of person who needs humor in everything you read then this is not the book for you as there is very little comedy. I would highly recommend this book for anyone looking for a nice story that fits a more modern perspective with age old fairy tales!

Becca's Best Banana Bread!

Ever have an excess of bananas on the verge of going bad? I know we always seem to! Besides eating terrible, mushy bananas, you can make delicious banana bread! I love this stuff! It is super moist and yummy and just all around great! Perfect for breakfast, dessert, or a midday snack. This makes about 2 loafs of bread.

Bookish items

Lately bookish items have been on my mind. My sister asked me why on earth I wanted all these book related things such as t-shirts; Funko pops, jewelry, pins, artwork. The majority of them are useless aside from t-shirts and jewelry. Last thing I need is another mug or bedspread, but that isn't stopping me from desperately wanting them with them quote "Ignite my love, Ignite" (From the Shatter Me series, I love Warner!) I have no idea why I want these awesome items that don't do much, but I really really do! I have a whole collection of Funko pops that are so totally adorable! I also get so many cool bookish items from my owlcrate box that I don't need, but are really fun! I find it kind of funny that we crave these totally worthless things because they are cute or cool. For example I spent a bunch of money on my shadowhunters taro cards. I have never used them for anything other than put them in the case on my bookshelf, yet I have no regret in buying them. Of course in order to not go broke I am not allowing myself to buy anymore bookish items outside my owlcrate box. I have been contemplating making my own bookish items. It isn't very hard to use sharpie on a mug or fabric markers on a t-shirt. I already make my own jewelry so it wouldn't be hard to expand. There is some sort of extreme satisfaction in buying these things. Maybe I just have a shopping addiction, who knows. I just need to make sure I don't blow my college fund on a mortal instruments themed room! If you have any DIY ideas for bookish items comment below and share them! If I like it I will give a tutorial and a rating on my blog! Happy Reading!
 

Why Time Flies

They say time flies when you are having fun
And it crawls when you wish it would sprint
Time and I are friends you see
But it has never been good to me
Leaves me behind while it soars
My knees still pressed against the ground

Just three weeks left
Feels like more
But summer has to end some day
Summer and I have a love hate affair
Work to be done
Time to be wasted

I can't deny the sounds
The creaks and the shakes
Can't blame the elements of winter
The rain, the heaters, footsteps in night
Makes me know I'm not alone
Pull the covers over my eyes

But I am alone
At least for two more days
Or three more weeks
Until I see them every day
I see him every day
Beautiful torture

Time and summer have ganged up on me
Left me with boring forced words to write
And wonderful stories itching in my mind
Forced me into a schedule
Forced me into society and responsibility
Leaving lazy days behind for months  

They Say the Sequel is Never as Good as the First

Since I just did the amazing series I need to finish post, I figured I might as well show some books where I either plan to never finish them or I wish I hadn't. The first (Or fist couple books) I highly recommend, but the rest of the series I do not. For this post I will be including a rating of the first book, an overall rating of the series (If I finished it), and a rating for the book where the series started to suck. I would never want you to waste your time reading bad books, so here is a way to prevent that! (Also I love to rant about books so this is a win win situation!)

1. Small Town Magical Romance

Beautiful Creatures was a good book with a bad ending. Instead of giving the readers what the whole story had been building up too, the author decided to have absolutely nothing happen and push everything off until the next book. Sadly the next book was so confusing that I decided not to continue. I think I got maybe 3/4th of the way through Beautiful Darkness before I realized the series was just going to keep spinning and leave the reader in the dark. Because the book does not end well, I would not recommend reading it unless you want to take on the whole series. I really liked the initial story that the author created and I wish she had stuck with it because then I would have stuck with the series. 

Beautiful Creatures by Kami Garcia
My rating: ❤❤❤❤
Series rating: I did not finish the series
Where the series went wrong: Beautiful Darkness ❤❤

Beautiful Creatures by Kami Garcia is a whirlwind of plot twists, romance, and magic that is sure to keep readers entertained until the very last page. The small town of Gatlin holds very little for Ethan Wate. He can't wait to escape both the town and the dreams of a gorgeous girl he has never met. When Lena Duchannes moves into town an aura of secrets seem to surround her. Lena holds a power that has been passed down from her family for generations and must hide it from the town of Gatlin. Lena and Ethan find themselves drawn to each other and soon feelings start to grow, but can Lena give up her secret? First off, this book might be one of the most confusing books I have ever read. While I very much enjoyed reading it, I had to reread the ending several times to understand what was happening. The romance between Lena and Ethan is fantastic! I loved how the author made it a large part of the story, but still focused on the plot. The element of magic is very important in the book and it was very different from other books I have read. I also loved the setting and how being set in a small town in the south really enriches the story. Overall this book is really good, but the rest of the series not so much. I would recommend this book to fans of romance, magic, and fantasy.
View all my reviews

2. The Hunger Games Meets the Bachelor 

I love to rant about The Selection. America drives me crazy because if I was in her position, the whole series could be covered in the first book. The first three books in this series were fantastic and the plot arc they covered was really well developed and finished. Sadly, I think Kiera Cass got a little too drunk on her success, so she spent very little time on what came next. The Heir and The Crown should have never been written. They are not necessary to the series. The characters and practically non-existent plotline they contain are really poorly done. I really expected more from Kiera Cass and she let me down. Now the good news is, The Selection and its accompanying two books as well as the many novellas are really, really good. Basically, if you just forget The Heir and The Crown ever happened, you have found your next favorite series! I know I gave the series a four out of five rating, but that is just because of the last books. If you take those out the series gets a five out of five for sure! I really love these books and I definitely recommend them! I swear I am telling the truth, my copy of The Selection has been read so many times it is completely falling apart! (Actually I have reread the selection more than any other book I own, with Eclipse coming in close second with one less reread!)

The Selection by Kiera Cass
My rating: ❤❤❤❤❤
Series rating:❤❤❤❤
Where the series went wrong: The Heir ❤❤

Kiera Cass brings a whole new story full of romance and fierce competition set in a dystopian world that readers won't be able to get enough of in The Selection. America is happy in her meager life as a five. She has her family, her music, and her secret boyfriend Aspen, who shows signs of proposing. So when an application for the selection shows up on her doorstep, there is no way she is going to jeopardize her happiness for the tiny chance of becoming the uptight Prince Maxon's plaything and the Princess of her country. When a course of events cause her to sign up, America is astonished to find she has been selected. Upon arriving at the castle America has her heart set on going home, but the palace and the people in it are not what she expects and America finds comfort in the arms of the last person she would have ever thought to look too. The Selection is one of my all time favorite books. I love the world that Kiera Cass has built and the characters she brought to life. America Singer may be one of my least favorite characters in all the books I have read, but I love her for it! The romance in this book is so agonizing as what is very obvious to the readers takes its time to appear to America. The plot in this book is very well done and works really well through the whole series. The character development is just so fantastic as we get growth from both major and minor characters that feels realistic and relatable. While the world is a little confusing at first, it is well explained and all questions are answered. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who loves romance and science fiction!
View all my reviews

3. Fantasy that will be Loved by all Readers

Graceling is so good! Like really, really good! And the next book Fire is also like really, really good, some would even argue that it is better! Sadly the last book, Bitterblue, is really bad. It is a total let down compared to the amazingness of the first two books. The way the Graceling series works, is that you can read the first two books in either order, but the last book requires you to have read the previous books to understand it. Graceling and Fire have different characters and are really different books. The thing that links them is the world (kind of), the writing style, and the fantasticness of the story! I actually never finished Bitterblue because it was so disappointing, but from what I read it only deserved two out of five. I would also highly encourage listening to the audiobook version of Fire because it is really well done. (I have not listened to the one for Graceling so I am not sure about that one!)
    
Graceling by Kristin Cashore
My rating: ❤❤❤❤❤
Series rating: ❤❤❤❤
Where the series went wrong: Bitterblue ❤❤

Katsa is a graceling, a person with two different colored eyes who possess magical abilities. While the the gifts might seem like a blessing, it curses the graceling to a life out of their control, serving their royalty. Katsa has been graced with the ability to kill and is forced to serve her Uncle, the king, by killing off his enemies. Katsa had ruled out all happiness in life until she met the fascinating Prince Po. Graced with combat, Katsa and Po form an unlikely friendship that threatens to out secrets that will change their lives as they know them. This book is phenomenal in every way. The characters are extremely well developed and entertaining. The plot is action packed and full of surprises, yet it is not confusing. The world is extremely creative and well explained and truly transports the reader. I read this book in middle school and it completely opened me up to the fantasy genre. One thing that the author handles perfectly in this book is romance. This book is in no way a romance novel. It has really well balanced romance in it, so that romance lovers and everyone else will enjoy it! I would highly recommend this book to anyone as it contains things that all readers will enjoy!
View all my reviews

4. Romance on a Spaceship 

Across the Universe feels like a standalone novel. When I read it, I assumed it was a standalone, because the ending actually wraps up really well. When I finally found out about the rest of the books, I realized that the story continued. I really enjoyed what the author did with the second book and I was really looking forward to the last book. Shades of Earth was nothing like the first two in the series. It got really weird and kind of felt like author was just grabbing at something to throw off the readers. So here is the thing. You can't read the second book and not read the third because it will not end right. You can read the first and stop there. I would recommend trying the first one, if you are satisfied with the ending then stop, because it isn't going to get better. If you really need to know more, read the whole series. Romance enthusiasts you are going to want to read the whole series as you just don't get enough from the first book. Everyone else? Just do what feels right. Who knows, maybe you will enjoy the last book more than I did. 

Across the Universe by Beth Revis
My rating: ❤❤❤❤❤
Series rating:❤❤❤❤
Where the series went wrong: Shades of Earth ❤❤❤

Beth Revis gives us a beautiful science fiction story of romance, technology, space, and the future in Across the Universe. Amy barely agreed to be frozen for 300 years on the spaceship Godspeed in order to travel to a new planet and she definitely did not agree to be woken up 50 years early. Suddenly, Amy is thrust into a new society where she is utterly alone, except for Elder, the young leader of the ship. Elder has never seen anyone like Amy before and he is mesmerized by her. Eager to please, Elder helps Amy learn about life on Godspeed. Together they realize there is more to Amy being woken up then meets the eye, and Amy and her parents lives are in danger. As the secrets start to unravel, Amy and Elder realize that Godspeed seems to run on lies and any sort of future together may be doomed. I picked up this book in middle school due to its gorgeous cover and it took me barely a chapter to realize that I loved it. The story is fantastic and the romance is beautiful. I spent many years believing this was a standalone novel as the ending is fantastic and it was not until a couple of years ago that I realized there were more books. Sadly, the rest of the series is not quite as good as the first book. One thing I loved about this book was the society on Godspeed. It was so well crafted and original and it really brought something more to the story. I would highly recommend this book to science fiction lovers!
View all my reviews

5. I Just Read The Uglies Now What?

I love Matched so much. It is truly a really good book. Unfortunately, it suffers from something that happens pretty commonly in Science Fiction books, which is when the last book stops reflecting what was happening in the first books. Matched handles it better than say, the Divergent series, but it is still apparent. Reached was not what I had hoped it would be. The characters changed too drastically with not enough time for build up. This caused the last book to feel unrealistic and out of place. The good news is that it is still a good book. Compared to the rest of the series, Reached gets a three out of five, but as a book in general it is probably a four. This series is worth reading the whole thing because you will not be satisfied with just the first book. Also, if you are looking for something to get you out of weird mindset caused by reading the Uglies series, then Matched will do it for you!

Matched by Ally Condie
My rating: ❤❤❤❤❤
Series rating: ❤❤❤❤
Where the series went wrong: Reached ❤❤❤

Matched by Ally Condie will feed your addiction to dystopian romances with a fantastic story that will leave you begging for more. Cassia is ready to be matched. She knows the government will pick someone she will love because they always pick correctly. They chose everything in her life; where she will work, what she eats, when she will die. When Cassia finds out she has been matched with her best friend Xander, she knows they have picked perfectly. But the screen doesn't just show a picture of Xander, for a second it shows a picture of Ky. Now Cassia must make a choice of her own that will lead her to see how her society really works. Matched is one of those books that came out right as the young adult dystopian craze started up. I can completely understand why people could not stop reading Matched as it is fantastic! Matched is layered with a lot of commentary about society in it, that I feel a lot of younger readers are not able to pick up on. I recently reread it and was amazed by everything I had missed. In addition to this, Matched has a fast paced storyline, interesting characters, and a well built world. The one thing that the Matched series suffers from is setting up a story that then completely changes in the later books. I really loved this book and I highly recommend it for anyone who is a part of the dystopian fad.
View all my reviews

And I Darken by Kiersten White Full Book Review

Spoiler Free Review:

And I Darken by Kiersten White
My rating: ❤❤❤❤❤

With fantastic characters, beautiful scenery, and an epic storyline, And I Darken by Kiersten White brings a whole new perspective to young adult historical fiction. There is nothing Lada Dragwlya loves more than her homeland of Wallachia. So when she and her brother Radu are ripped away from their father, the prince of Wallachia, in order to become prisoners of the Ottoman Courts, Lada makes a promise that she will one day return home. The one thing Lada hates more than the Ottoman Empire is being underestimated for being a girl. Lada knows she is stronger than all the men combined, so she sets herself to plotting her revenge. That is, until she meets Mehmed, the intriguing son of the Sultan. In Mehmed, Radu finally has a friend and Lada someone to give her heart too. Can Lada open up her love to more than Wallachia? I can not completely describe how amazing this book was. I picked it up because I am a terrible person who totally judges books by their covers. When I read the synopsis I expected something along the lines of My Lady Jane or The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue, historical fiction with more contemporary characters. This book was so much more. I happen to love history and god do I wish a history text book was written like this! Of course a lot of the history in this book is from the author's mind, but the basis was so well researched and historically accurate. This book actually inspired me to do further research into the Ottoman Empire, which earlier in the year I had found totally boring. The three best things in the book are; the characters, the history, and the incorporation of Islam into the book. That of course can fit both into the characters and the history categories, but it was so fascinating that I think it needs it's own shout out. This is not a religious book, please don't stop reading this review because you think it is, it is a historical book. Islam was a major part of the Ottoman empire and the author handled it really well and completely enriched the story. The characters in this book are horrible and I love it! I can not say any more without spoiling the book, so go read it! This book is perfect for lovers of history and intense characters, though it is not for everyone. I would not recommend this book for people who want a basic storyline, a quick read, a comedy, or a basic romance novel, because this book is none of those things.

Recommended Mindset For Reading

And I Darken is not the kind of thing you can pick up, set down, and pick back up again a month later. The storyline is complex and detailed, requiring a lot of focus. This also isn't something that you can read all in one sitting. I would make sure you have a week where there is adequate time for reading each day. Not that you will have a hard time getting yourself to read, as this book is extremely engaging. While you do not have to love history to enjoy this book, you have to have some respect for it. The plot and the characters can not single-handedly hold up the book, the history is a big part, so if you hate it, this book is not for you. Also, if you want a cute romance novel, go pick up P.S. I Like You by Kaise West (I have a spoiler free review of this on my spoiler free review page!) and leave this book be. There is nothing cute about this book. So I hope I didn't scare you off because this novel is phenomenal!

Try Not to Eat the Whole Batch By Myself Chocolate Chip Cookies!

I love chocolate chip cookies. I mean so do most people, but I really love them. Actually I really want some right now, but its 80 degrees outside, so it's too hot to bake. Also I am sick so no cookies for me. But there is nothing holding the rest of you back from eating some cookies! This recipe is originally the Tollhouse cookie recipe with my minor adjustments as well as my notes to make it dairy free! This recipe makes about 5 dozen cookies.

Reading Withdrawal

I have now learned that if you start off by reading two books a day and then cut yourself off and read zero books for multiple days, you will start to go insane. I have come to the conclusion that reading is an addictive substance! We have had friends over and I have not had the chance to read, which is giving me serious withdrawal. A Man Called Ove is sitting in my room and I found myself slowly inching towards it. Eventually I was just holding the book in my lap and talking to people, which meant I got some interesting looks! I am even missing my required summer reading that I have skipped a couple of days of and now have to read and take notes on 10 chapters. I am not looking forward to that. What really sucks is that school now starts in less than a month and I will not have much time to read. Maybe I should just marathon a bunch of books before school starts to try and get it out of my system. Don't worry, I am just kidding, I could never getting tired of reading! I have sadly burned through all of my cute new young adult romance novels. Maybe I will get a new one in my owlcrate box (If you owlcrate people are reading please give me more! I loved The Upside of Unrequited and P.S. I Like You) Basically, reading withdrawal is a very serious condition and might affect you or a loved one. If you have symptoms of restlessness; dreaming about Will Heronadale or any other book boyfriend, staring at your book for long periods of time, staring at your bookshelf for long periods of time, reading fanfiction on your phone and trying to hide it as you are supposed to be interacting with people, obsessively blogging or reading other blogs while you are supposed to be interacting with people, reaching out towards books like your long lost love as you pass by a bookstore, or trying to explain the complicated plotline of a major fandom to your cat, then you may be in serious trouble. Do not fear, the solution is simple. Just shirk all other obligations in life and pick up your book. If anyone judges you, just calmly explain that this is necessary for your survival. If symptoms persist even after reading, then you may be in danger of a reading slump. And to cure that, well you are just going to have to wait until next week! -Becca      

Moving On

Sometimes it's hard
to move on
to forget
to stop the obsessing in my head
Why do you have to be
the person I want to share it all with
to talk with
to listen with
Why do you have to inspire my stupid poetry
why can I always come back to you
I want to scream at you to let me be
stop leading me on
I know you don't mean to
But it sucks
it really does
you tell me to wait
you disprove of them all
pick something already
friends or more?
you say the former
yet you won't let me move on
its really hard
to move on

Books That Made Me Cry

Have you ever felt like you just need to get a good cry in, but you don't have anything to cry about? Well boy do I have a solution for you! Just pick up any of these books and you will be in for a marathon of crying. Besides the effect they have on your tear ducts, these books are extremely well written and are a guaranteed fantastic read. Just make sure you always have extra tissues on hand! In addition to my regular spoiler free review, I have also included a rating for how much this book will make you cry. This way, you can make sure you have enough ice cream to balance out the tears!  

1. What We Should be Reading During Eating Disorder Awareness Week (Part the First) 

This book earns three crying faces on the scale, as you should be prepared to use up a box of tissues. Stevie's emotional journey is a roller coaster that goes from the present; to a flashback (AKA time to cry), to an interaction with another patient at the treatment center, to a therapy session (AKA also time to cry). This book is so beautifully written that I have actually decided to use it for an interpretive reading in speech and debate. (Speech and debate nerds, don't you dare steal my idea! I will hunt you down and send you a strongly worded letter!) This book truly captures how an eating disorder can completely take over a person. I have a lot of friends who are currently struggling or have struggled with an eating disorder and reading this book actually helped me to understand what is going on just a little bit more. I very much encourage young girls to read this book and hopefully it will inspire you to extend your awareness about eating disorders, as well as show just how much each of our lives are worth.   

Paperweight by Meg Haston
My rating: ❤❤❤❤
How much will this book make me cry?:😭😭😭

Readers will be shocked by this emotional masterpiece guaranteed to make you bawl your eyes out in Paperweight by Meg Haston. 17 year old Stevie has lived a hard life, and she is ready for it too end. Stuck in an eating disorder treatment center, she has lost all control of her life, and is being forced back into the state she views as fat. Worst of all, they won't even give her satisfaction of being anorexic. No, instead they call her bulimic, reiterating her knowledge of just how weak she is. But it's okay, it only has to last for 27 days, just until the anniversary of her brother's death. Then she can repent for her role in losing her brother, by giving in to the sweet, sweet, release of death. This book was so well put together. The combination of flashbacks to Stevie's life and her meetings with her therapist caused me to just cry my way through the whole book. The characters in this book were so complex, and some how, the author managed to give them the development most characters get over the course of three books, in just one. The writing in this book is very real and relatable: especially for young women dealing with body image issues. I would highly recommend this book to all young adults as it deals with so many issues that hit very close to home. This book makes you want to smile through the tears and I beg you all to read it!
View all my reviews

God is a Woman by Michael Tavon Full Book Review

Spoiler Free Review:

God Is A Woman by Michael Tavon
My rating: ❤❤❤

Readers will shocked by the utter honesty and raw emotions that play such a large role in, God is a Woman by Michael Tavon. Price Jones has led a life of tragedy. Growing up abused in the home of an addict, has scared him, and left him doubting his self worth. Now, he uses sex and drugs to cope with his perceived failure as an author, a brother, a son, and a person. When an former love walks back into his life, old emotions are rekindled, as well as old heartbreak. Will Price be able to rebuild his life and mend his broken heart, or will he give in to his inner daemons? I think calling this book a romance novel is very misleading. While romance plays a large role in the story, Price's journey for self-discovery is what really takes center stage. I am not really sure how much I enjoyed reading this novel. My usual pick of young adult, romance, fantasy, and around 800 pages, is pretty much the opposite of this book. Regardless of my enjoyment, no one can argue that this book isn't good. The characters show such a parallel to the misery and hardship of our world, and while the plot is uneventful, it accurately portrays the monotony and agony of every day existence. This book is definitely an adult novel and not for all readers. My reading experience suffered as I was not able to relate to the characters on any personal level, but for people who can relate to the characters, then this book could have a huge emotional effect on you and I would highly, highly recommend that you read it!  *Disclaimer I received this book from the author in exchange for an honest review and this did not affect my review as my opinions and writing are 100% my own*
View all my reviews

Recommended Mindset For Reading

As I said before, this book is for a certain kind of reader. For those of you who feel you would enjoy this book, then I would recommend reading it all in one sitting. It's very short and it won't take you long to finish, but the writing is very powerful, so, prepare yourself to sit back for a second, and say "Whoa, what did I just read?". Believe me, you will need some time to decompress. If you do end up reading this book, please comment and share your feelings, as I am interested to see how others felt after finishing it.

Owning Multiple Versions of a Book

I was recently inspired to write about this, when I opened up my owl crate box to find, The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee, as the book of the month. As you may know, I posted a full review of The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue a few days ago, so I obviously have already read it. I actually own the ebook version. I had to take a second to think to myself, how do I feel about owning multiple versions of books? I own all of the Mortal Instruments by Cassandra Clare, in both ebook, and paperback versions. Back in November, I received Heartless by Marissa Meyer in my owl crate box, which I had already pre-ordered on my ereader. I have to say, I really like having multiple versions! With Heartless, and The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue, I have owl crate exclusive covers, that are both beautiful (as you can see by the pictures below). With books, there is more than just reading them. Owning these books is kind of like having a collection, except the things you collect, have a really great use that never goes bad. Having multiple versions of an item is not at all uncommon in a collection, and having exclusive version of something makes it much more valuable (Not that I would ever sell my books!) Also, as a bookstagrammer, having multiple copies of a book makes it really easy to do giveaways. You still get to keep a book, but you also gain followers, and you know your book goes to a booklover, and will get good use! I think that many people would say owning multiple copies is a waste of money, but I think the pros out weigh the cons. That's all I have to say on the matter, what do you think? Comment your feelings on owning multiple versions of a book, and what books you own multiple copies of. Happy reading! -Becca